Those who know me know that I am extremely confident (to the point of arrogance or so people tell me). I have told people in the past that 95% of the time what I predict might happen comes to be in some form or another. Maybe not literally, but generally or figuratively. How can I be this self-assured (or maybe arrogant)? It is because of what Bill Shakespeare said above: "To thine own self be true." If you can be true to yourself, no one else can tell you anything you do not already know. For example, I am a big person. I way about 300 lbs. If someone calls me "fat" or "stocky" or any other term, I am not offended. This is because I am true to myself and know I am a large person, that I weigh too much and that it is not good for my health. Because I practice the words of Shakespeare, I am pretty much not offended by or sensitive about anything. Any words or jokes or statements someone tells to me cannot hurt me, because I am my own worst critic. My confidence comes from that fact.
Now, this has often gotten me into trouble in the past. Because I come across as confident (or arrogant) to some I threaten them or offend them in some way. It is not because what I did or said was really offensive or insensitive. It is because they have not been true to themselves. I had a boss who kept saying: "You cannot call a person's baby ugly". What he meant was that you should not criticize other people's work because they might get offended. But why? I realized it was because they were not true to themselves. It is not being dishonest if it is true. If the baby is ugly, the parents should be the first to accept that fact. Then they can go about life in truth, rather than living in some ideal, Utopian, world of denial. If a person's work is less than stellar or incorrect they should be the first to recognize that. Then they can make the correct efforts to improve their work. If they continue to feel their baby is beautiful or their work is superb, they are generally settings things up for disaster--a lifetime of ridicule or failure to move ahead in the world.
Being ugly or poor at your job is not a crime. It is a fact or reality. Facts are neither good nor bad. They just are. When you are true to yourself and accept the facts about you, then the only person who can offend or truly criticize you is you. The "offensive" or "insensitive" words hold no meaning anymore. They are empty. And because the words are empty they cannot fill you with anger or destructive forces. Truth and confidence in yourself is a shield no one can break.
Let's say you have a major project for work or school. You are putting in a lot of effort to do the work. You turn it in. Your supervisor or teacher looks it over and informs you it is not what they wanted or not good enough or poorly done. Many people take offense at that and then begin to get angry or hate or resent their "idiot" boss or their "stupid" teacher. If the person were to accept that they had not met the goal or "cut the mustard", and that they needed to go back and do better next time, things would work out a lot better for everyone. Overtime they might even realize that they need to do it right the first time, every time. When you are confident that you will only do your best and that you are right, there is no need to worry about whether you have done what is expected.
Take some time and google the following concept: COMPLETED STAFF WORK. I think it will help to further cement what Bill Shakespeare so eloquently put into Hamlet.
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